THRONE WEATHER — your daily forecast from the Kingdom Weather Desk.
Today: strong crosswinds over the north field, gusting to "hold onto your hat" and occasionally beyond that into "the hat is gone, accept it." Light hoops drifting fast and low — beautiful to watch, inadvisable to chase.
Advisory: the Weather Desk has issued a hoop advisory through Thursday. Secure loose hats, small dogs, and your dignity, in that order.
Tonight: winds ease after dark. Excellent conditions for stargazing, quiet walks, and pretending you meant to lose the hat.
The outlook: calmer by the weekend, with a 40 percent chance of someone dramatically pointing at the sky and shouting. This is normal. Do not be alarmed.
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